Impulse purchases.....

I do not need another coat.

Need....no.

And yet.

Today I bought two coats.

I didn't need them, but I was feeling a little devil may care, as I was in the Charity shop with both Ma and my big sister, and feeling decidedly like I was working for care in the community ..... it was a challenging  shopping outing all in all and so I decided to treat myself to whatever the heck I wanted.....

So rather than think about my purchases I just did a what the heck this is a charity shop after all and bought two coats.....because to my mind that is the beauty of Charity shopping....you can buy tons of stuff and it doesn't ever break the bank/ it is for a good cause/ if you get sick of what you buy/it doesn't fit/ the colour makes you look ghastly then you just donate it back in.........win/win.

So this is the parka styleeee type one.....

and, although there isn't a photo of the other one, it is a lovely dark woollen military style coat by Jaeger.

So, bring it on weather - do what you will........I will be warm and toasty in my bargain coats.

That I can hang with my other jackets... and coats..... and macs.... and gilets.... and overcoats ...... and not everything I own is from a charity shop - but having so much choice is lovely.

Oven's on.....

Mix photo one with photo 2, twice, and then empty the bowls and hope that the oven works its magic.......

Nothing to report.....

It is cold here.
I have switched the electric blanket on.
Have just had a cup of tea and I am wondering if I have ever seen Mary Berry in quite such a colourful top before.....Mary goes funky!

Thankful.

Ok, so I didn't win the big rollover lottery.
Whatever.
Imagine me shrugging my shoulders.

Family circumstances continue to mean that I am constantly mithering away
 in my head about things that I have no control over.
This too shall pass.
Imagine me nodding and looking wise.

The world seems to be going about its business in a way that makes
no sense to me.....some people have no food and others
throw food away (not finger pointing here..I am
as guilty as everyone else)..and eating a bacon sandwich as I type.
The world has turned for many years and I hope will turn for many more...maybe humans will become kinder and more responsive to the needs of  others.
Imagine me looking hopeful.

We need jobs and education and health care and someone in charge who
will help steer us out of these troubled waters.
Not sure how that is going to happen.
Imagine me looking perplexed.

I had a migraine this week.
I cannot kneel down as there is something wrong with my knee.
I need glasses on now to do almost anything, not just read.
Imagine me looking stern....the world is NOT about I/me/mine all the time.


You know when you read something that seems to
jump out at you as if to say you..yes you..this is for you....?
Well earlier while blog hopping I stumbled upon the words 'too blessed to be stressed'.
Imagine me smiling......not being smug....just smiling.

Thermal vest needed?

My mister has just booked us a little cheap and cheerful trip from t'interweb for November.
One of those 3 nights and flights deals.
 I am so excited!!
The hotel is obviously not expensive or fancy (unlike your accommodations Trish!) but tripadvisor research shows that it has clean beds/good location so as we intend being out and about most of the time then that is all that matters.
Copenhagen here we come!!!

Out of place?

Ma wanted this chest of drawers taken to the tip.
So I took it from the back of my car and plonked it here in the middle of my landing while I decided what to do with it.
Now I quite like it....I think.
She said it was bought when I was young.
It has been in her little spare bedroom for as long as I can remember.
She is in purging mood.
Every time I visit now she has sorted out stuff for either the charity shop/tip/me or anybody that might be interested.
Usually plates or jugs or knick knacks or clothes or handbags or in fact almost anything and everything.
Most I take to charity shops.
This though, I think I might keep.........maybe change the handles?
What do you think/
Yes or no?

Mixed emotions.....

We are back from a couple of days at the coast (courtesy of my sis/brother in law and niece) and had a lovely time......good food, drink, excellent company and just generally enjoying being away from stresses and strains of normal life back here.

We woke up and saw signs of sunshine each morning..

and checked the sky to see lots of blue...

It was a relaxing little mini break.
I think that if you need a break, it does not have to be a long break......holidays of two weeks are great but a couple of nights can be all you need.
We visited long enough to catch up, to unwind, and to have a good time.
We came home and felt refreshed.

Today was back to GP visits/Pharmacist consultations/problems with medications for Ma and trying to tell Pa that is was ok that he had bought a mango instead of an avocado....everybody makes mistakes and he is getting to be beyond stressed just lately and displaying signs of wear and tear.
I can understand why people of a certain age used to employ companions or nurses or housekeepers....my parents are beginning to need to have someone to help out in various ways and as much as I love them I cannot see a future where that role falls naturally to me in a full time way and I will be able (or truthfully want ) to do it.............I work and I live an hour away from them.......sigh......I suppose worrying about the future is pointless just now anyway so in fact what will be will be...........
I only know that on the radio today, I heard that if you had a stressful job, where you had no control over any part of it, (and I do hate my job too so that doesn't help ) that you had a high chance of having a heart attack........which is not what I need to hear when I feel the responsibility of caring for aged parents.....
Pause...........................have just read back what I have typed and feel very disloyal and ever so slightly 'poor little me'.......and yet.......and yet......my parents are in their mid eighties, I am a 58 yr old 'sandwich generation' working woman, who I guess is just whinging a little bit, and in this instance, I am going to allow myself to do it.
And book lots of little mini breaks.

She's out....

Ma is home.
She is well.
With a prescription that has changed some of her medication,
so we shall see how she fares over the next few weeks.
She is glad to be home.
Pa is both relieved she is home
and ever so slightly put out that his week of eating what he likes, how he likes, when he likes, and not listening to my Ma 24/7 is at an end.
She never draws breath and cannot stand a silence.
She is back to being a non stop wall of sound.
Every day now he will be back to pretending he is going to the newsagents when really he is going to the bookies. Every day she knows he is going to the bookies.
Every day he will have to wear clean clothes and not slob around in his comfortable gardening/messing about trousers and shabby cardigan.
And after over 60 years of marriage, and their history, he would say to me as we drove to the hospital 'she drives me around the bend y'know......but I do miss her'.
Yet I do wonder how things would be if the boot were on the other foot so to speak......if he were in hospital.
I don't like to think about the future with regard to Ma and Pa really.
As trite a saying as it is, it is true that we really should just appreciate the moment and not worry about the past or the future.
With that in mind I am off to have a cold beer.
Cheers.

Today I will be listening to.........??

The drive to my parents house takes between 40 - 60 minutes depending upon traffic.
Close enough to get to easily but far enough away that it is a 1.30/2 hr drive in the day.
I like driving. I enjoy having time to myself in a little space where I can sing at the top of my voice or think quietly or listen to the spoken word (no - not the voices in my head!) via a play or discussion on the radio.
I keep lots of cd's in the car. I do not take care of my cd's.
They get scratched.
I have tried those cases for multiple cd's....didn't last long.
I do not really care about the cd's because I throw them around or onto the back seat or under the passenger seat or into the door well.
My family get very cross about it.
As they should.
I am contrite (but I still do it...).
Anyhoo.
Each journey is flavoured or seasoned by a different music depending on my mood.
Sometimes my kids make me cd's of songs I like or they think I will like.
Sometimes I go back to old favourites.
Recently it has been Frank Sinatra or Simon and Garfunkel or Leonard Cohen or Joni Mitchell.
Yesterday I played one my daughter had made me that I hadn't heard for a long time.......it made me laugh, smile, cry, sing and really enjoy the ride...........
Here are the just a few of the songs.......

50 cent - In da club
Blue Nile - Family Life
Ray Charles - You don't know me
J-Kwon - tipsy
The Killers - Mr Brightside
Gilbert O'Sullivan - Alone again
House of Pain - jump around
10cc - I'm not in love
and on another disc
New Radicals - you get what you give
Everything but the Girl - Miss you

and the music just goes on and on and on and isn't that grand?

Driving - seeing how beautiful the fields are - seeing how amazing the sky is - listening at full volume to music.
Being in that state between Home/normal life and Hospital/Interrupted Life and enjoying the moment.
Life.

Catch up...

Thank you everyone for taking the time to comment. If I can find a consultant/doctor/nurse/health care assistant to talk to then hopefully we can bring her home today...fingers crossed.
The 52 reasons gift is one I nicked from t'interweb and was really good fun to make. Traditionally I have always made my sister a gift, starting with her 21st, and although she would have been happy with anything, I used to have a bit of a problem choosing something for her as for many years I couldn't afford to buy her anything she used/wanted/needed.

Thinking of, and typing up the reasons, was thought provoking and quite a laugh at times.
Perhaps I should have used something a bit classier than a kitchen skewer to connect all the cards though!

Today has been.....

Reminding your Pa that he needs to wash his hands as you enter/leave a hospital ward. Being a bit concerned when a young girl tells you there is lots of Sickness and Diarrhea in the ward today.
Being pointedly ignored ( I think I must have slipped into invisibility mode) by the 16 or so professionals at the desks/counters/chairs/computers just outside the ward (I'm sure they are very busy and very very important but cheeesuz....acknowledge me people) when trying to find out about your Ma.
Treating yourself for no reason and buying two Royal Copenhagen eggs....'cos they are pretty.
Dad telling me about meeting Irving Berlin and Dean Jagger and Ethel Merman and Bessie someone.
Realising that sitting on a hospital bed can cause you to be given a withering glare and a 'please get off the bed' being barked at you.
Look away now if delicate.............being told that Ladyparts lose moisture with age.....and that buying Silk over the counter is recommended as  'I believe it's rather good'..........thank you nurse.
Listening to the fabulous Frank Sinatra and thinking how big bands must have been really cool to be in/watch/listen live to.
Thinking how horribly expensive those lovely plantation shutters would be in your bedroom if your sister is paying £800 for one small window!
Wondering if the fact that there is no hot water coming out of the sink tap in the bathroom is going to be a big job or a small job.........and how much it is going to cost.
Having a telephone conversation with a woman that you last spoke to 44 years ago and having her tell you 'you sound just like your mum'.
Your husband fixing the tap!
Thinking that you wish you could find a decent job for your son......
Trying to cheer up your daughter because she feels a bit under the weather and still hasn't decided on her dissertation subject.
Stirring Herman the German Friendship cake mixture.
Seeing your mum in her jamas sat by her bed and looking pretty darn good for a scared and blind 82yr old and thanking mother universe/the fates that she is still here to nag Pa.
Eating cheese and crackers and not giving a care about your belly being a bit tight in your jeans...surely the jeans must have shrunk in the wash? and if not? well what the hell.

Thinking that I am lucky to also have 52 reasons to smile, just like the ones on the gift I made my sister.
Counting my blessings.